I BURN VILLAGES, NOT BRIDGES

10/07/2024 — essays, self aware
Surreal collage of a smiling man with a halo lighting a match in front of a burning cardboard village, as smoke spelling ‘Comfort,’ ‘Denial,’ and ‘Mediocrity’ rises into the night sky.

Boundary enforcement as urban planning. 🔥 I Burn Villages, Not Bridges Let’s get something straight: I don’t burn bridges. Bridges are for people who hope to come back and apologize. Bridges are concessions, limp excuses, little insurance policies wrapped in brownie points. I BURN VILLAGES. When I decide you’re done, I don’t leave a polite …

“Insofar As,” “Henceforth,” and “Vis-à-Vis”

02/19/1983 — triggered
Surreal collage of a scholar performing an exorcism on a glowing levitating thesaurus with a dinosaur on the cover as words like ‘Henceforth,’ ‘Vis-à-Vis,’ and ‘Ontological’ swirl around him.

🤓 Pretentious for No Reason Every generation breeds a new species of person who thinks English isn’t complete until they’ve dressed it for the opera. They can’t say “also”; it’s “insofar as.” They can’t say “from now on”; it’s “henceforth.” They can’t say “about”; it’s “vis-à-vis.” They can’t say until now; it’s “hitherto.” It’s like …

THE FUCK IS VOCABULARY?

02/19/1983 — essays
Surreal collage of a cartoon boy holding a giant green thesaurus with a dinosaur labeled ‘Thesaluaurus,’ surrounded by floating speech bubbles asking ‘What the fuck is vocabulary?

💬 The F*** Is Vocabulary? Like what do you mean you have a “good vocabulary”? So you can spell the words you know? Good for you. Want a fucking sticker? People act like “vocabulary” is some rare gemstone you mined out of a cave. No. You just learned some words. Congratulations, you unlocked the same …

The Object

Surreal collage of philosophers and saints worshipping a glowing rock with googly eyes on a velvet pedestal under a banner reading ‘The Object.’

(currently unavailable) It’s not new.It’s not improved.It’s not even particularly interested in being owned. Still, people keep asking about it.What it does.What it’s for.When it’s coming. The answer is always the same:It already has. Description Grounded. Smooth. Unresponsive. Made from a single, naturally occurring material formed over time under conditions we neither created nor fully …